Friday, 28 March 2014

Interview: What is Orgasmic Meditation?

I went to an orgasmic meditation course the other weekend (review to follow). It was probably the most surreal event I've ever been to. And I've struggled to explain it properly to friends - although it's quite bizarre, it's also very natural. And I've realised, you can't really rationalise or explain something that's so natural. So, instead, I interviewed Maya - a passionate, switched-on, orgasmic meditation tutor.

So, what is Orgasmic Meditation?

Orgasmic Meditation (OM for short) is like yoga for your sex life - a 15-minute practice where a partner strokes a woman's clitoris with precise attention. Instead of reaching for the goal of climax, OM teaches people a new model of orgasm that works for women's bodies. It's process-oriented, feminine, and gives both people a lot of extra energy. Men learn to feel their own sensations as well as her sensations in a way that boosts their confidence undeniably. 

Founder, Nicole Daedone, at an OMing class

What is the *actual* process of OMing?

She undresses from the waist down and butterflies her legs open.
He sits to her right. And sets a timer for 15 minutes.
He puts on latex gloves, and some lube.
With his left forefinger he begins stroking at the 1 o’clock spot in the upper left quadrant of her clitoris.
As lightly as you’d stroke your eyelid.
15 minutes.
She and he relax into the sensation of the stroke.

An Orgasmic Meditation "nest". Image from

Why do people do it?

There are a LOT of reasons why people OM. But some of the main ones are: To understand their relationships and sexuality more, to have more energy, to increase their sensitivity, to learn how to live from their desire

What's in it for men?

Men learn how to feel a woman so intensely that there is never a doubt about what she's feeling. They go from being "the guy who doesn't know what's going on with her" to " the guy who can feel the subtlest shifts in her mood." The experience is, surprisingly, very pleasurable for men. They start to feel a mirrored experience of what she is feeling. They literally feel her Orgasm in their bodies.

What's in it for women?

Most women don't even know what is possible in the realm of orgasm. What we're taught is that if you can climax, or better yet at the same moment as our partners, that is the best it gets. The truth is that the way we've thought about orgasm is a fraction of what is possible. As you practice, you begin to have a visceral sense of filling up a hunger that most women didn't even realize they had. Or, it can take your sex from being good to even better.

What's in it for single people?

OMing for single people is great! We have a huge population of single OMers who practice the meditation with other practitioners they make friends with. It's refreshing to be able to develop your sexuality, communication, and desire even if you don't have a romantic partner. It brings more vibrancy to who you are as a person so every part of your life will be enhanced, from friendships to work.

What's in it for couples?

For couples, OM deepens how much they can feel connected to each other. Almost more importantly than in times of good, OM helps couples stay connected when things get rough. In those times, it's often when couples want least to be connected, but when they need it most. OM gives them a practice to sync into to spend 15 minutes simply feeling.

How did you get into OMing?

I found it randomly, five years ago, from a friend telling me about it in NY. I went to an event and fell in love. The level of honesty and realness that the people had was inspiring, not to mention the glow. Then I tried OM and didn't feel a thing but was determined to open this part of myself up. After even a short while of practice, I had so much more energy and my desire and sex life were getting phenomenal.

What are your plans for Oming and where do you expect it to go?

We've been growing it rapidly over the last decade. Our plan is to hit 6 billion OMers.

For more information, add your question in the comments below. Or watch this great TED talk.

Wednesday, 19 March 2014

Review: Nymphomaniac Vol. 1

I'm going to say up front: Nymphomaniac Vol 1. is an utterly wonderful film.

It's the first of two films by Lars Von Trier and has a whole host of amazing actors. Vol 1 follows the early life of Joe, a depressed, self–deprecating, exhausted female nymphomaniac played by Charlotte Gainsbourg. A nameless man (played by Stellan SkarsgĂ„rd) finds Joe on the street – bruised and unconscious.

He takes her in, fixes her up, and gives her some (weak-ass looking) tea. His gentle, non-threatening, nature comforts Joe and she begins to tell him her life story. It's the start of an incredibly tender and non-sexual relationship, juxtaposed with a (pretty graphic) promiscuous life story.

No spoilers here – you really must see this film – but there are some incredibly compelling moments within it. From fly-fishing metaphors about promiscuity, to Uma Thurman's 15-minute cameo in which she TOTALLY fucking nails it.

And unsurprisingly, there are some completely shocking moments too: from really (I mean REALLY) explicit oral and anal sex scenes involving a 15-year-old Joe, to horrendous British accents by Christan Slater (Irish?) and Shia LeBeouf (South African?!).

We're going to watch Vol 2 next week. It's even more graphic, brutal, apparently unwatchable in some places.
My flatmate said he couldn't even discuss it.
My friend says she walked out.
I can't wait.

Thursday, 6 March 2014

40 things we should all probably give up for Lent

1) Loud laughing at terrible jokes (inc. your boss and that hot guy in account management)

2) Using hashtags in real-life conversations (eg "urgh hashtag worst day evahhh)

3) Saying ‘LOL’ ‘or ‘WTF’ or ‘FML’ in real-life conversations 

4) Drunk visits to Chicken Cottage

5) Drunk visits to McDonald's

6) Drunk visits to your ex

7) Drunk texting

8) Drunk blogging

9) Being in a glass case of emotion 

10) Going on about Leo Dicaprio and his never-to-be-Oscar

11) Trying to make ‘fetch’ happen (IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN)

12) Logging out of LinkedIn so you can stalk people without them knowing

13) Art directing your salad before Instagramming it

14) Facebook stalking exes

15) Facebook stalking anyone

16) Inviting people to play Candy Crush

17) Inviting people to your bad gig

18) Hate-reading online

19) Secretly liking Katie Hopkins

20) Secretly liking Piers Morgan

21) Avoiding eye contact with pregnant women from the comfort of your Tube seat

22) Farting in lifts and looking around incredulously to disguise your guilt

23) Wasting WAY too much time looking at memes and Buzzfeed

24) Saying ‘I’m not being funny, but..’

25) Saying ‘just sayin’

26) Wearing pink on Wednesdays 

27) Sending colleagues Snapchats

28) Tweeting First world problems


30) Weighing yourself completely naked to get best results

31) Social smoking

32) Smoking

33) Alcohol

34) Smoking and alcohol

35) Coffee

36) Wheat

37) Gluten

38) Hangovers

39) Fun

40) Writing lists